Yeah, what a cunt. you should've scattered some watercress seeds in the carpet. give it 6 months and she'd be fucked.

Forgive my ignorance, but what would watercress seeds do?

That sounds a bit dirty, really.

They apparantly start to grow in the carpet and make you have to tear it up and get rid of it.

Much more sophisticated than my idea of putting dogshit in the cupboards. Well done.

I hearfd about it on talksport. someone rang in and said they did it to their ex because he'd been cheating on her.

You have to give women credit for the cleverness of their malice. Never trust them.

Hey! I own a house! (Well, half of one) :(

Hm, well I have an update.

I went over with dad, my straight uncle and my straight uncle's friends in a van to pick up the piano and the washing machine. The bitch was so uptight and she'd called her dad over to try to argue with us. The dad was like 65 or something and was moaning on and on, "why are they still here", "why is there a patio table in the garden", "what are we supposed to do with it" etc. As he went on my uncle's friend, the ugliest one, just shouted what everyone wanted to hear; "tell the bitch to fuck off". I guess the prospect of a group of 5 angry young(ish) men scared them a little so they eased off in the end and let us take the stuff. Bitch hasn't moved anything into the house yet! So I guess she rushed us out yesterday just to be a slag.

The street the house is in is packed full of gossipy old bastards and uptight housewives, she'll fit right in. I didn't get to take any pictures but oh well. Her time there will all end in tears, you'll see.