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:) Thank you.
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Everyone's stuff is really good. I love these threads where people share their talents. I am addicted to Jenn's blogs. She is genius I tell you, genius!
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*snoopy dances till her heart rate goes up to like 187*
I'll be in Cali for whatever shows SY play out there this summer, it's about time we actually meet! Hopefully Patrick can come, dependent on his job. He's a pretty big deal at the chocolate shop. |
Oh we are SO hooking up! I plan to go to as many of their gigs here as I can. Hope Patrick can come too. We could all go to Knotts Berry Farm/Snoopy's house too, its cheap. :)
Back on topic, my contribution to this thread. Song I am working on, hoping to record soon; each line is opposite of line prior, hence the title, etc... Contradiction BY: KARLIE GRAY (KEGMAMA) © Needing you more, but wanting it less, Feeling content yet my heart’s not at rest. Satisfied and happy, but confusion sets in, Knowing where to start, but not where to begin. I’m found and surrounded, yet lost and alone, Feeling so little, but I know that I’ve grown. Eager and helpless, yet patient and strong, Knowing what’s right, but feeling so wrong. Contradiction, Affliction baby- Afflicted, Addicted… (chorus x2) My heart beats, yet I’m dead inside, I want to be out, but instead I hide. Masking emotions that rage within Knowing where I’ve gone, but not where I’ve been. Sexy and strong, yet ugly and weak, I’m a virgin whore, an exciting bore, yeah. Sick and tired, yet well and awake, How can something real, be so fake? Contradiction, Affliction baby- Afflicted, Addicted… (chorus x2) Running and screaming, while I walk quietly along, This is the beginning, to the end of my song… |
My short story. DOn't steal it, fuckers!
"Are you done in there?" Carl rapped at the bathroom door and whined, "I’m lonely." "Aren’t we all?" Suzie quipped, "I know sweetie. Almost done here. Be a doll and get me a drink please?" with all the sarcastic yearning on "please". Carl didn’t answer and walked to the kitchen to pull out some bottles he put away five minutes ago. He paid no attention to the brand names and labels and poured based on color. He tried it and grimaced. Still, it was alcohol; greedily he drank some more, walked back to the family room and stretched out on the couch. Suzie emerged grinning. "You’re very smiley. What did you do?" Carl suspiciously asked. "How do you know I did something? I could just be happy." "My son is all teeth when he’s guilty as sin; nothing serious, just stealing and hiding something of ours." Suzie fell onto the couch, almost on top of him and replied innocently. "I never took anything." "Not this time." "What do you mean?" "You really thought I wouldn’t notice you wearing my wife’s shoes? She grounded our son because she figured he did something with them." Suzie’s face drooped. "I feel terrible, Carl. Poor thing. Well, it’s a good thing I wore them today. I’ll just put ‘em away now. Tell your wife you found them, I don’t know. Someplace weird." "I’ll think of something." "Ya know, from what I’ve heard, she’s kind of a bitch." Carl’s face twisted in offence, but softened to a stern expression. "She is not a bitch. She’s very sweet and I love her." "Then why am I here?" An offended Suzie demanded. "Because you’re fun." "She’s not?" "A different kind. You’re outgoing, sociable. Like me. She’s quiet and sometimes she says I can irritate her. You know, with my 'loudness'." "If we have so much in common, why didn’t you marry me?" "Well, I didn’t know you then. And two, I’m in politics. Politicians marry Jackie, not Marilyn." Suzie crept off the couch to her feet to look down upon him. "I’m not classy enough for you?" "I wasn’t that harsh. Besides you don’t even like politics. It drives you crazy. You said it yourself!" "I know, it just upset me that you think I wouldn’t be respectable to be seen with. But you’re right, I would hate it. I’ll go and put these shoes back." Suzie twirled and walked to the back of the house. Carl sat staring, wondering whether he made a mistake bringing Suzie to his home, to his life. Weighing the outcomes of breaking up with her, he took a gulp of the drink Suzie ignored. Suzie emerged grinning. Modeling his wife’s red dress, shoes and tight bun hair, she strutted down the hallway to the family room. Carl sat staring. "Jesus Christ." "Guess who I am." Suzie cooed. Carl pushed himself off the couch to be face to face with her. "Suzie, this is not normal. Go put these back," He glanced at the wall clock. "Damn! She’ll be home any second. Hurry up!" "Who will be home? I’m your wife. Do you have another woman in your life?" She jealously demanded. "I’m warning you. Put the clothes back." "They’re mine!" Carl’s hand flew and made contact with Suzie’s face with a crack. She stood stoically erect, the tears welling up belying her defiant stance. Unnerved, Carl began stammering. "I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I just lost…" The garage door opened. "Damn. Please Suzie. I’ll call you. You parked across the street, right?" Suzie nodded. "OK, the back door will be closest." "What about the clothes?" "She never wears that. Just go, I’ll think of something." Suzie walked to the back door as Carl rushed to meet his wife at the front; she opened the door just as he did. She heard his warm welcome and his wife's loving responses and how he repeated her name in their talk. She slammed the door and listened. Suzie heard a "What was that?" and strutted back to the family room. |
I've been agonising about my relationship with hyphens lately. I had a period of being overly fond of parentheses (y'know, like this) but I decided they lack balls. Because balls are very important to writing. Now a hyphen - the little line things - they're good; the problem is using them too much. You can't go wrong with a semi-colon: brilliant fuckers they are. But I use the everything-hyphen like I think I'm Shakespeare-incarnate. It's doing my own head in. I probably think too much about writing to actually write. Better, some might say, than writing something bad. I think I'd agree with those some.
Anyway, you all carry on, you seem like you're having so much fun. |
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The single best sentence in the history of messageboards... ever |
abstraction in f sharp
big claws&rabies spit. bite bite bite. its all you seem to do. well sir now that i'm sick i'll foam at the mouth too. &we'll see who kills who. be it teeth to the neck or knife to the chest i'll make a ruin out of you. |
I wrote this on a sunny day while sitting on a sun-warmed granite slab with a picnic basket and a treacherous whore:
And that was when I learned About lying sluts With dream worlds that fucking hack Your meager ego Assail the vulnerable with With pretense and whoreific Sales Hang sluts with diamond Barbs Chained bitches Chop chop Them up and feed directly to The motha fuckin’ Tarrassque Fuck you |
Four Poems:
I. I got spit shine in my eyes making the world sparkle like diamonds in the headlights of an oncoming steam roller. Slow slow shimmers, shattered under weight like the skulls of more interesting wrecks. Spin shine is still spit and you have to be rich to find out if diamonds really shatter. II. Shoot myself through the cheeks with candy bullets. Youth is dwindling into the future. III. A moth out side my window struggles against the pane of glass, trying to get to an old touch activated lamp. It is brainless, it is inconsequential, this moth, and yet there it is. IV. On weekends, the house maid comes to clean the houses. She doesn't speak English, sadly, naturally, but there is no awkward chit-chat. I find the loneliest spots in this home-owner association bull-shit, to escape something about her. Her detergent dry hands probably work another job too. I get back, and she's finished up. I ask the poor lady, can I give her a lift anywhere she needs to be? Another job, or her home? And she accepts. So I took her out there, to a crowded trailer park, and I guess I felt horrible. I got back to the home, clean as ever, and continued to be a mess. |
hey you -
you look like someone i know from long ago the hands were writing warped soul tedious creations hey you - let me sing songs into your vagina the dark despair in between your legs i'm leaving this place i'm leaving you |
Listless patina:
A whistful smattering Of whimsy Despoiled the chair, leg. |
APRIL 20TH
Today we went for a picnic and you put a daisy in your hair and i wanted to shag you APRIL 20TH PT. II We were in Tesco and saw Keith and his son in the DVD section they were probably buying something raunchy to watch together because they are weird bastards aren't they APRIL 20TH PT. III I have needed a piss for ages now but I can't be arsed getting up and going down the hall so I'm just going to try and forget about it |
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great lines there, didn't care for most of the rest |
Thanks :D
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Shaka - I like the start of a verse narrative, more people need to be doing this rather than relying on lyrical verse etc. but I couldn't follow your thread
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danny, can you simplify all of that? cut a bunch out and i don't think you'll lose the point
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I disagree Kloriel. I think the simplicity of the subject matter mirrors well with the long, almost drawn out lengths of the peices. like, he's saying 'my 4/20 was long and the only parts that are worthy of their own line are subordinate clauses'
this may sound like i'm being a bitch, but i really really liked it, Danny, and i think what you wrote goes really well with the structure. |
yes, I agree 'bout simplicity, but would it be possible to convey the long/drawn out lapse of time without the long drawn out chopped sentences? Can the passages be condensed and still carry that sense?
You're not a bitch for disagreeing with Lord Kloriel. I"m just happy people are posting writing. |
I'm just going to repost this here, if you don't mind:
Evol poem. "Find it in a girl." From a thousand years ago. She knows how to make love. In panic, I forget it. And then I kiss her stomach. My mother used to say, Over and over, "Find the meaning of feeling good." |
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