The wank of victory is one for those of mighty penii, and firm of stroke.

Your wank is that of the feeble: small and clumsy and bendy of grip. Enjoy your feeblewank, feeblewanker.

Bored now. Why does my office outlook keep on shutting down and stops me from sending out emails? Why? Eh? You tell me, you silly twat. Yeah, you do.

Ctrl+alt+Del > Task Manager > Processes. It's probably getting confused, I expect you've got more than one instance of the application running. Either that or there's a problem with your mail server - can you access your shared drive? Check to see if that drive is connected - if not, your mail server's on the fritz.