• Every time the electricity goes out, I have to go "outside" to refuel the whole-house back-up generator!

• My laundry detergent box claims it has 42 loads, but I'm pretty sure I'm only getting about 39 loads!

• My internet speed isn't worth a shit when I just try to stream movies while uploading large files!

• Sometimes my hands hurt when I have to keep clapping to get my noise activated power switches to just work like they're supposed to!

• Sometimes when my iced mocha frappe drink isn't made with enough stuff, they just cheat and fill the excessive free space in the cup with extra whip cream and syrup!

• Someone clearly cut me off and made me wait in the Express Checkout!

• Why does this packaging have other languages on it!

• I can't just take my doggy for a walk on the beach without having to pick up it's shit!

• All I want to do is just record everything I've ever wanted to watch on this TV's DVR, but the damn harddrive thing only allows like 400 hours.

I'm on my 3rd! fuckingn PS3 and might have to get a new one...or "repaired"

I woke up to the sound of birds singing and taking a dump on my window sill. Why do birds exist? Eh?

today, i couldnt give a flying fuck!

i can't decide which of my 39793676973 t shirts to wear today. my sock has a hole in it.

I just got a new phone--Moto Backflip and got all excited about free Kindle books. But despite what the bastard salesperson said, Android 2.1 is not yet available for it and therefore no Kindle!

Bastard!

Maybe you should trade in a t shirt for a pair of socks?

When I get home I feel like I should have stayed out more, when I stay out more I feel I should have gone home earlier.
Social life is a mess.

Just stay out all the time. Problem solved!

it's raining! :D

Sony stopped importing the PS3 to Korea because Japanese tourists would take advantage of the falling won.

Everything that is 'on Demand' is bullshit.

I hate my parents because they won't pay my car insurance anymore.

My printer is put of ink.

I couldn't find any spare electric guitar strings so I had to use acoustic strings on my electric.
Teaching myself to play guitar lefthanded is harder than I thought it'd be.
Some albums I was planning on buying haven't come in to the store I work at, so I bought them somewhere else which means there was no staff discount.

Grass is to sharp.

I find that there are too many raging queens with access to computers in the first world.

Phoenix, man, I thought you had died of kangaroo-AIDS. How the hell are you?

Yes? Are you going to complete the simile?

Grass is to sharp as fish is to flat?

Is that where you were going?

been on a hunt for some grass, but all I can find is day time shit :/