Am I a bad person?
 

I got my report card in from school. Straight A's, highest GPA in the freshman class (940 people). I got nothing from my parents. No reward from the woman that is always on my back about getting Bs on assignments in a class that I have an A in. All I got was "Good job Mr #1 in freshman class" I had known I was the #1 in the class for a long time and I told my mom that but she didn't care until she saw it in writing. Anyway, I got nothing, and it isn't like we are poor. I wouldn't feel bad if I didn't know that I have friends that get $30 dollars per A or even $1000 for straight A's. And what makes it even worse, these people don't even try hard in school. They get an F and say no big deal. One of my friends is too lazy to even copy homework. I can't stand it! What is wrong with these people. Not only are their lives going to be much worse off because of their attitude and grades, parents with that kind of cash won't even motivate them. What is wrong with these people?

My question: Am I a bad person for being upset that I got nothing?

I know it is all materialistic, but I can't help being angry. I worked hard, and I want something. Something to have at the end of the year of hard work. Anything.


I usually don't get angry like this, and I am smart enough to not tell my parents how I feel about it. But I just needed to vent.

Advocating underage drinking? For shame, Diesel, for shame....

I don't agree with using money as an incentive to get good grades. I know you are talking about it as being more of a surprise reward, but the expectation is still there. I never got paid. I don't wish that I had been paid. School is something that everyone has to get through. Just because you get good grades, it doesn't make you special. I wanted a 4.0 because I believed I worked hard throughout high school, and that would've been something to show for it. I managed to graduate with a 4.0. I'm satisfied with just that. I only wish I could've been #1 in my class. Be happy that you have that. It is its own reward. And really, by the time you get to college, you will have that money you are looking for in the form of scholarships. That's what I could have used, and I still wish I had tried just a little bit harder, just to ease the stress my family is feeling right now.

So to answer your question, yes, you are a bad person, and I'll be sure to tell Santa personally.

I don't care if I get money or not. Go out to dinner, or have my parents let me do something I don't normally get to do. Any kind of reward.

900th post....

I think it's just a natural expectation to get recognised for hard work. I read somewhere that the number one reason people quit/hate their jobs is because they don't feel appreciated. Don't know if it's true, but it makes sense.

I think it's really heathy to learn how to put up with lack of recognition, though. Can't say I've perfected it, heh, but the closer you get the happier you'll be. And the more rewarding it actually becomes.

Unfortunately, not rewarding in a way that can buy CDs...

It sucks, but I look at it as "character development." :rolleyes:

I've gotten straight A's throughout high school too, and I really don't expect anything as a reward. I think over 25 kids in my junior class have a 4.0 or higher, so it's nothing special to me.

I don't think you're a bad person for wanting a reward for working hard. It does suck how you get nothing and some idiot who has managed to get an A gets $30+. Wanting things is typical is most everyone.

That guy doesn't even get A's. He is a smart guy though. I knew him throught elementary school, he is just incredibly lazy. He failed PE...

Really though, I know it can be frustrating (although I never realized it until I found out just how many dumbasses were getting paid for passing grades), but I mean it when I say it will pay off eventually. You are number one in your class! Be happy! That is like a free pass to college, for the most part. And who doesn't like free stuff? The first time I ever tried cookie dough ice cream, it was as a free sample, and I've never looked back.

It is hard to be happy for things that might (not) happen in the future.

Everything is going to be okay! I gave you rep points because your grades are so spectacular. Everyone, I demand that you all give him rep points. #1 in the class! I really do envy and respect you for that.

You don't know that everything is going to be okay...That is something that I can never make myself believe. I'm not getting these grades for my parents, I'm trying to ensure that I have a good future, but I don't think anything that I do will make me totally sure that everything is going to be okay.

Oh and thank you. There are actually like 10 #1's though, so don't think it is that special...

I must spread appreciation first. But ya, I did well in highschool but nothing like that. If anything, it shows that you'll do well in life - if you want.

I had a friend like you. He was the valedictorian and still never thought he was good enough. Don't worry about it. You're fine.

I am generally a pretty pessimistic person, although a realist on a good day, but I just have to tell you to stop worrying. I didn't even seriously start thinking about college until my senior year, which is bad, but now I'm going to the school I wanted to go to so I can't complain. When you worry, especially outloud, people get headaches. And then it will create a domino effect, only in this case it will be misery. And soon everyone in the whole world will be miserable, and it will be all your fault. If you're not worrying about college and just life in general, well stop it. There is no point. Worrying never solved anything. You can think, "Oh hell, I really screwed that up," but don't dwell on it. I already realize that I am in the process of throwing away my chance at a successful future, just because I want to be a writer, or a teacher, or a writing teacher. Or a teaching writer. And everyone tells me that I'm not ambitious enough, and that I can be so much better, and make much more money doing this or that. But really I know that I could be content working in a used bookstore. I don't really care about my job. I don't care what my money comes from (although I prefer hard labor because I feel like I've earned it that way). I just try to focus on being a better person than I think I am, and being good to other people, except when I'm insulting them, and I think that will bring me more happiness than anything else could. So yeah! Good for that!

lmfao

Oh and Alex didn't you say yr family has like 5 Ipods or something.....sounds like you and yr family are probably pretty good to go man.....just sayin'. I'm not sure if yr parents throw you a bone or not, but I'm sure they give you what they think is best (I'm not trying to assume anything though).

Actually, I hated half of my teachers. Two of the other half I thought were awsome, and the 3rd liked me. I think he favored me because I was the only male that did well in that class (Spanish I).

For the most part, I had great teachers in high school. One I had a huge crush on that I suspect I will never get over and that will probably put me in therapy someday. But yeah, great teachers, and such.

Thanks, Lux...

...I don't really call it worrying. I am just concerned about the future. I am trying to define something that is so indefinite and I just don't really get anywhere. I do get stressed out about it, but not seriously worrying.

That's exactly where I'm at right now. Same subject, too. Money is supposed to make you happy. If you can be happy without it, you don't need it. Do what makes you happy. I would be miserable as a corporate millionaire. I'd be perfectly content as a teacher/writer just getting by. (Er...So long as my wife is happy and kids are taken care of - that'll be a priority that I don't really have yet.) Life is not as hard as it seems.

I had two really easy teachers. My geometry teacher would give anything an A, except for tests. I occasionally wrote several numbers and shapes on a piece of paper, titled it and handed it in as my homework and got an A. My biology teacher had to leave a couple weeks after the first semester ended and we got a long term sub. He was really easy. I accidentally turned in notes instead of the actual assignment and got an A on it.

Well as long as you're not ripping the hair out of your head, I don't think there's much of a problem to speak of. Flaunt it baby, flaunt it.

I never got any support from my parents during high school either concerning good grades, which were all nearly all A's. I made a only a few B's & got shit for it as if I had failed.

I relate, Alex's Trip.

My stepdad, who barely ever said two words to me all my life, ripped his pants-leg climbing a chain link fence at the football stadium where my high school commencement took place & where I gave the valediction. He hugged me & told me he was proud of me. That was the only time he ever expressed to any form of sentiment.

He was always insecure because my stepfather knew I was much more intelligent than himself & that I wasn't his blood. Everything I did to achieve only reminded him of this painful fact, & since we had no communication really, we never bonded in any way, shape or form.

My parents have never helped me financially. As for college, they never lifted a finger to help me there either & by then I wasn't even speaking with them, & I haven't in over ten years.

It's human (normal) to feel like that. Just know that good grades will help you in the future (college, or a good job). More importantly, the act of getting good grades helps you build your knowledge base, helps you 'learn how to learn,' etc.. which are far more important than grades.

I'd have to say, though, that your motivations for getting good grades are a tad off. Did your parents even say with sincerity 'Good job?' If not, that really sucks..sucks more than getting some trinket.

Shit, son. You think that is bad? I've been paying for all of my clothes, cds, computer stuff, food, and internet connection since I got a part-time job at Burger King when I was 14. My parents would make me pay when we went out to dinner. The sad part is that I could have been a GREAT student if my parents would have gave a shit. I'm still a decent student with straight As but I skipped a grade. I was labeled a 'genius' in the second grade. Got no wrong on the Iowa Basic Standards tests and shit. If I would have had a little motivation, time, or focus I could have easily been number 1 in my class. Instead, I started smoking pot and skipping school. My parents didn't even give a shit.

Consider yourself fucking lucky.

Why? Because I am motivated with or without my parents? Because I don't need someone to tell me not to smoke pot and skip school?

Yes. At least your parents GIVE A SHIT. My parents would be like 'B on an assignment? Tell me when you have real problems.'

And that wasn't really what I was talking about. I meant that you should feel lucky that they buy you other shit. Don't get rewarded for grades. Reward yourself by getting into a good college and amounting to something.

I would be doing the same things without them. They don't need to give a shit for me to be the head of my class, I am the head of the class for my own reasons. All they do is make me live up to more and more expectations.

I don't see how that is a bad thing. Even if I would have motivated myself back then like I am trying to do now I would have liked someone to push me along.

You shouldn't have put that "Consider yourself lucky" part at the end. It was hard to understand when you don't structure the post.

There is a fine line between someone pushing you along and someone pushing you over the edge.

Very true. Doing it all for yourself sucks, though.

We all think you are so much cooler now, not to mention hilariously original...:rolleyes:

Eh, better than doing it all for someone else, right?

lol. This is funny because "It was hard to understand when you DON'T STRUCTURED the post" makes no sense!

You are doing it for yourself AND someone else. It's like win/win or lose/lose. Either way it is even.

Yeah...that is true...

Fuck...I was going to write "When your post isn't structured" but then I went back and changed it and forgot to take off the 'd'.

Haha. I know. I wasn't trying to be mean. I just found it HILARIOUS.

If it makes you happy, it doesn't matter who you're pleasing. I know it's hard to ignore your parents, and I think at least through high school you should take all the motivation you can get, but you do have control over the reasons you work. It doesn't have to be all for them or all for you. And you don't have to stress out about not doing as well as you expect.

At the top of the class, you obviously have the potential to do well. Even if you screw up, with that potential you'll at the very least be able to straighten stuff out. Even if you were to bomb high-school, you'll still be smart and that's worth a lot for your future by itself. Even so, you seem to be doing well so it doesn't even seem like a problem. Just don't stress.

I hope you guys figure out what it's all for... The reason for going through another day, over and over again... :) Cheer up, Alex's Trip... It's all quite relative; are you as bad as, say, a guy who shallowly goes through life without appreciating anything, no music or artisitic or literary appreciation; no spiritual worth, devoid of feeling or soul, but still getting good grades, the girls, drives cool, fast cars his parents bought for him? :) Wouldn't a guy like that be bad?