Beard laws
 

The rules of beards in rock.



Good beard.




Shit beard.

It's the law, I'm afraid.

Wait,i have a few.

This is an incredible example of why beards have been offending communities all over the planet.The chap in question was arrested and hasn't been able to offend anymore:

i wanna deeeeffyy the logic of ouur beard laws

A good beard:

Elaborated goatees are also punishable by law.

A quick test.Look intensily to these beards and tell us wich ones you think are unlawful and wich ones you think are not:

Trick question!

Germans and Austrians are required by law to have ridiculous beards. The Swiss guy has a great beard. Nice try though.

Great.



Wrong to the power of a gizillion.

The third beard on top is not punishable.You got one right though.The other beards are scarily extreme but they could get away with the law.Next meeting this topic has to be a priority.

I trust this man with my life.




On the right, passable, but merits some attention. On the left, shit shit shit.

Beard.



NICK! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!?

Spot on.The one on the left is generally sported by people who dress like they are about to leave for sunnier climates but in fact are still sitting on a stool playing singerandmotherfuckingsongwriter music in some pub.Highly punishable and there is a fine on the spot to be paid within 10 days of recieving it.

yes yes yes.

Seriously though, are you back on the brown? For fuck's sake man, you have a reputation to live up to!

tick tick tick.

I refused to look at his beautiful face for that reason alone.He thinks he's above the law.

Nick Cave is looking rather frighteningly like Tommy Lee Jones with that ridiculous Fu Manchu.

The moustache is without a doubt the most difficult male fashion accessory (hair or otherwise) that one can attempt to pull off. 98 percent of moustaches are amazingly bad. Best avoided.
Nick, you look so good all the time. Why have you gone this way?

Edit:
I have always thought it was funny that the only guy in ZZ Top without a huge beard is named Frank Beard!

Don pulls it off nicely, though.

A life in good beards -













It's the beard see? Without the beard, he's wearing one of those hats. With the beard, you can ignore the hat. The power of the beard to destroy bad hats.

Yep that is a fine tache on a mostly fine musician.Not punishable but not entirely encouraged by this state's government.

But perhaps he looks great without? I hear you cry...



The power of the beard.

you haven't met many firefighters!

Wow,i had never seen him without one.I thought he was born sporting one.

Firefighters + moustaches = oiled-up homoerotic fantasy fodder supreme!

The link between firefighters and the gay community is very visible.More on that later.

ANY color-based beards are wrong.

In fact, no goatees.


Braided beards are a no-no.




Any kind of beard accessories are to be avoided at all costs.

We really need to stop picking on Nick Cave. It's making me a bit sad.

Beard accessories are indeed the work of the devil.

Some great ones on here:
http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.beards.org/dan01a.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.beards.org/dan.html&h=305&w=350&sz=46&hl=en&start=5&tbnid=UBG LHhaGSLeGPM:&tbnh=105&tbnw=120&prev=/images%3Fq%3D%2Bbeards%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den%26lr %3D%26sa%3DG

Glice - Sean Connery beards are always acceptable.

All right, last one.

A vintage,fine beard:

A graphic monstrousity:

A sexy beard:

He's smiling because he has a great, proper drinking man's beard.



The Dubliners give a lesson in good group-beard action.

Don't try these beards at home kids. Yes, they look fucking ace, but are you in Huun Huur Tu? No? Then don't risk it.

Fuck me,YES!Him from Arab Strap always gave me the horn with that beard.Here's a worried and deeply disturbing goatee: