Ask porkmarras
 

...

hey Porkie, come butta?

Bene bene,grazie.

Erm....gay man,like?

are you gay? there was one post not too long ago that made me question if you were gay or a women or... not...

ahahah that's class. i'm glad you doing fine man. gay man. or not. it's not relevant really. you still kick ass.

dear porky,

when do you think is the best season to shave one's private parts?

donald ritchie.
west sussex.

Do you shave your private parts?Freak!

Yeah i'm happy too.Have a good day.

FWD: dear porky,

are all men pigs? all my girlfriends tell me that.

rosemary abercrombie
devon

What a ridiculous thing to say.I should know as i'm a pig myself.

dear porkmarras,

why do so many people take themselves so seriously?

benazier buto, house arrest.

Because they're poo.The smelliest poo,you understand.

dear porkie, i'm trying to put up some weight. i'm actually 52.8 kgs. what can i do?

Fuck off.Ask pookie.

that was bad. you hurt my feelings.

Why did you stay at home tonight, instead of going out, and drinking yourself into an oblivion?

Because Because.

When are you coming to vist me, darling?

porky: should i be nervous to see the girl i'm jonesing for tomorrow with her boyfriend and douncebag friends?

dear porkie,

why do fools fall in love?

Will it ever get better?

ha.

Whe are YOU coming to visit me?

Make sure to bring a bottle of vodka with you and don't be afraid to make a spectacle of yourself.

Cause they're fools,you said it.

We'll burn.

dear porkie,

whenever i make a curry i always seem to burn something. what can i do to prevent this?

yours, jo dalesandro.

That's a bit harsh!It's only the internet after all.Did you offend some Ween fan or something?Actually,i have a question for you.Could you remind me the name of the music for longing in portugese?

Make it while sober.

madredeus fucking slay!!!! their lead singer has the most beautiful voice in the world and it's...wow!!! next time they come to mexico i'm so going!

Thanks again for the links Sn@ke.I've found some real gems on there.

mainly the reason i've never gone to see them live, everyone is banana's over them here. the reason they are big (it's not like they get played on the radio or anything) it's because they tour here a lot and they are overwhelmingly good. i've seen a phenomenon here that bands and artists who come play here are bigger than those that don't tour here, it's be like, for example, no one is into instrumental post rock or whatever, then tristeza comes play here and all of a sudden everyone is into them and their like, instrumental bands start popping out, mogwai plays here, sigur rós' videos are on mtv, etc.

Codeine?I have a friend that has a similar problem since she was a little girl.She takes codeine for it but careful with that stuff or you'll end up addicted to it.

dear porky:

my willy hurts when i piss, do you think it has anything to do with my dayjob being a penis baseball player? do you think it'll be ok for the anal/urine orgy i'm going to tonight?

david ulricht
bremen

An orgy of std's you mean?

that's human kind in relationship with the places they are from. i can't have mariachi music or prehispanic music, i hate it, it's like a drill to my ears, i like some authentic norteño music (popular folk music from the northern part of the country) i like some banda (a mixture of cumbia, salsa and norteño played in big marching band-like ensembles) because it's so annoying it's almost noise, but most of the typical music here i hate. madredeus don't play stadiums here, they play like concert halls and stuff (i think the biggest place they have played is the national auditorium, that one is really big actually) but they are very famous, they get media coverage and everything when they play here.

they are a great band, nonetheless.

god! been there...

I'm broke or I would.

Porkie,

My life hasn't been the same since Busted split. Which ex-member's band should I start liking?

Busted fan,
Lower Buttfuck