Why?
 

Have you ever had a relationship with someone who can completely drive you off the rails?Someone you quite possibly fall in love with at first sight since you hear that 'click' in your head?You know the type of situation i'm talking about.An encounter of spirits........

Yes. Yes I do. Why?

Absinth?

Just asking.It's just that that type of person is really playing with my head at the moment.

Brilliant!

He decided that he had enough of living in London as he spent all his life in here.He went on to do a Phd in fine arts in Australia and now he's not sure anymore as he misses home too much.I knew it was gonna end up this way.The many arguments about me going to join him over there proved exactly what i thought:that i was right!It's been a few months now and i've been trying to get over him with some degree of success but i still get mails from him that say how much he's in love with me.I'm terribly confused.

Yes toxic johnny,that's exactly what i've thought and kept on telling him.I was clear enough that i didn't want to have a long distance realtionship.In his head he does still think that one day we will live together like in 'Love Boat' or something but my realistic self thinks this is not going to happen unless he will do the right thing and come back home(as much as Australia is a beautiful place,i'm sure).He has talent and he's sharp but when it comes to day-to-day things he can be terribly immature.

Why is he opposed to coming home, if he misses it so badly?

Tell me about it.One is because he quite certainly misses me(and i sure miss him too).Two is because doing a PHD in Australia is certainly cheaper than doing one in England.He also has no-relationship whatsoever with his family apart from his sister who lives,guess,in Australia.Such a mind-bugging situation.

Does he plan to come home after he's through? Have you considered moving there?

I have but it was never in my plans to start with.As much as i would probably like it,it's not something that i have ever thought of doing.He plans to come back to England after the three years that his course will take but i simply do not want to have a relationship with someone who lives on the other side of the planet.It just does not work out that way for me.I think it is a case where he found out that he's struggling like mad to survive over there and he's getting well depressed.I love him though.

You claim a long distance relationship doesn't work out for you, but you are quite obviously still hung up on him.

I say, go the ultimate romantic route - either hold out for him, or throw caution to the wind and move there. How often in your life do you encounter 'true love'?

If you don't make an effort in one direction or another, you will live the rest of your life with unanswered questions and lingering regrets.

Wow! Listen to this girl, Porkmarras, my man, she speaks much sense.

i had a similar experience to toxic johnny, and second what he says.

Piss off, you wet blanket.

you've been reading too much mills & boon

Does that mean that I'm a wet blanket too!.

fuck it, throw hell to the wind, pack a case and off to Oz, this is clearly doing your head in and you have to go just to see, if it doesnt work out get on the plane back home. ok you've spent X amount of money going and coming back but the money you've spent is the cost of finding out once and for all, then you know and its the end of the chapter - life moving on - case closed. I feel for you brother, love can make the most ordinary people do the most extraordinary things but dont ever comprimise, dont be a doormat. you deserve more.

Many a time i have thought of packing buckets and spades and head off to sunny Australia just to be with him.But i also believe that if you love someone you will find a way to compromise in order to make the relationship work to its best.This i understand myself but i am not sure if he does.Even though i would obviously like for him to come back,i also understand that you should follow your dreams and be happy with it.This i understand perfectly well.There is more to the story.When i first met him he was in a bad way and he was playing havoc with his own body way too often(self-harming).I take full credit for changing all that by setting my foot down and make him stop the madness.Many times and with loads of love and unbelievable patience.I'm not saying that because of that he owes me anything but surely he should understand that we both have different agendas in this life and unless that agenda is a clear one it is probably better for both our lives to drain down two different plugholes.