Am I Really a Smart Whore?
 

Of course I know what I think...

I've known a few in my time.

oh, you've done it now.

Yes, but I did it then too. That's the whole fucking point.

i do it every day.

I love them whores, they never judge you.
I mean, what can you say when yr a whore?

"Join the club."

still, that's not a very judgmental thing to say. it's fairly accepting, in fact.

i'm going to be clever soon. i spent a lot this night. so this is sort of a place holder, like a discus thrown with the understanding that someday it will come back and lay out upon a desk of flopping goldfish*

*=also some tank cleaners

do you mean little sucker fish or do you have a professional team come in?

I'm voting for professional team. with proton packs. like ghostbusters.

are you fucking with my goldfish*

* = and their tank cleaners

depends. do they have sexy flippers? would they be adverse to wearing fishnets?

find a tailor for my goldfish and we are in business, sir.

they aren't the bulge-eyed kind, are they? that's a deal breaker. it's a sure sign of faulty thyroid. gotta have that thyroid in goooood condition.

you see my fucking eyepatch? you think i'd push goldfish with fuckt thyroids with one fucking eye? what the fuck. you know, let's hose the whole thing. i'm jamey sheridan, you think i need to be dealing with this shit. fuck. i should be glazing babes faces with sherishiraz, not defending my goldfishies' glands. You know what, fuck all this. Fuck gold fish and fuck the fuck. I'm going in with something new.

word on the street is, you have some excess goldfish that yr wanting to unload. I'll only give you a quarter each, because the other word is that they have bulging eyes and hemorrhoids. it's fish-mills like yrs that brought the world to it's scabby knees with fishaids. so, deal? quarter each.

done. and go fuck yourself with a shark fin.

have you ever had The Pleasure of Shark Fin?

the screams stop when you grow callous.

man, you should hear those sharks scream.

how the fuck do you think i got an eyepatch? guppy fishing?