[the ikara cult]

Dear Jonny Borrell (out of razorlight)

I often walk down the street, and i see alcoholics staggering around outside Asda, gripping both a trolley and their own lapels simultaneously. They trip over the trolley, and their fingers slip from the greasy, unwashed fabric that makes up their jackets.

I often wonder to myself, "What do the manufacturers of cheap spirits think when they drive past these people?"
Jonny, i think you have the key to this pressing question that is at the forefront of our minds in these chillingly austere times. For the purposes of science and medicine, will you, mr Borrell, the next time you hear one of your songs on the radio, tell us how you feel?
Because i suspect you feel the same as the manufacturer of the cheap chemical piss that is slowly dissolving the brains of millions of people; when they drive past the shuddering alcoholics, and when you hear "America" played for the hundredth time on the radio, both of you think to yourselves in the same sadistic tone

"I did that..."

Please consent to having your genitalia rigged up to a cirrhosis powered battery.