[atari 2600]

bagpipe music and keyboard slamming (Reply to this comment)
by mindsuzz
My nightmare coworker is what you might call a quirky individual, and the whole department cheers when her vacation comes. She doesn't fart, but she does just about every other annoying thing.

1. She plays her music loud. She plays Celtic music, bagpipe music (at 7:30am), John Denver, bird calls, enough Mariah Carey to make you want to throw yourself out a window, and what sounds like suspense movie background music. I wear headphones daily.

2. She talks loud. I'm thinking of giving her a megaphone with a mute button for her birthday. She talks and laughs loud on the phone and when people drop by her desk with work requests. Her laugh is loud and horsey.

3. She snaps at you when you ask her questions. She even snaps at people who are at a much higher level than her. I can't figure out why she never was fired. She complains and sighs while she's working, and slams her keyboard while she types.

4. She talks to herself in a hissing whisper, on and off all day long. She clears her throat for 15 minutes straight every day after lunch.

5. She brought in a mug warming plate and kept scented candles melting on it, and gushed about how she loved the vanilla scent. Meanwhile, everyone else was getting dizzy, nauseous, and kept rushing outside the building for fresh air.
After one coworker called in sick 2 days, the rest of our department converged on our supervisor, who nixed the warming plate. She pouted for days.

6. She claimed she was cold in the winter, and starting running a space heater ALL day long. I complained when I was ready to pass out from the heat, and another coworker brought in a thermometer, which registered 90 degrees. My supervisor told her to lose the heater or get moved to another spot, and OF COURSE she loves her spot so much she lost the heater. Wish I was given the option to move, because my cubicle is right next to this troll.

7. Did I mention that her appearance is "sexually ambiguous"? She reminds me of Julia Sweeney's SNL character "It's Pat". She isn't married, and her family doesn't have much to do with her. She has a couple of friends here, and that's a mystery too, how they can stand her.