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the last time i got obliterated i passed out at a frat party with a few friends so we wouldnt get date raped (that was so fucking stupid. they could've easily date raped us all.) and when i woke up my friends left to go get burger king. and i was left in this nasty ass apartment by myself. not only that but i was locked in. so i crawled out of the window and chased after my friends car as they left the parking lot. but they didnt see me. so i crawled back in. only to find that it was the wrong apartment window that i crawled into. i was still pretty drunk. so this fat fuck was absolutely speechless and staring at me from his kitchen as i tried to explain to him, 'hey, you had a party here last night and now i can't find my purse.' 'uh... i dont think you have the right place.' and then i started digging around his apartment and telling him, 'no. this is the right place. where is it.' and then i started crying because i couldnt find it and i thought someone stole it. so he was even more stunned and bewildered. poor guy. he was nice though and let me leave out the front door so i didn't have to crawl back through his window.
theres not really a happy ending to this. it just gets worse.
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