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Originally Posted by amerikangod
I'm not even kidding, you just made me consider the northwest. I don't know if I could deal with the hippie culture though. Are there areas with considerably less hippies? Or zones in which they are outright reviled?
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absolutely, there's Eastern Washington and Idaho! You will certainly get the color scheme you seek, and OH THE WOOD PANELING (with taxidermist decor of every species imaginable) though you'll have to substitute meth for coke and wash it down with moonshine made using runoff from playing watersports with your sister. don't go mentioning fondue either because that would be far too close to voting for Obama.
however, open season on hippies is 366 days a year, 367 on leap years, and the derby is just for "most" and "biggest" because nobody can keep track of "first". there is seriously a large movement in Eastern WA to secede and change the name of the new resulting state to "Lincoln", though I don't think anyone has told them yet that even though he was the first Republican, he also freed the slaves...