waking up with the sunrise

alteredcourse · 07.27.2008, 01:37 AM

My dad died last night. He outlived his idols, outlived his mother and all his 8 older siblings, and outlived me. I can forgive him for the lifetime of tears ive bled for him because he is human but somehow I feel like I wont ever forgive myself. I'm sorry for putting this here, but I dont know what else to do.

acousticrock87 · 07.27.2008, 01:41 AM

Shit. I'm so sorry.

My best friend's dad died unexpectedly about a year ago. I know that there's really nothing anyone can say to make things look brighter or whatever, but be around friends and family. You'll need some time to yourself to sort it out, too, but you need people around to share it with.

MellySingsDoom · 07.27.2008, 02:07 AM

Holy Christ. The only thing I can say is that if you want to talk to anyone here, then please do so.

My thoughts and ermpathies are with you.

Sonic Youth 37 · 07.27.2008, 02:10 AM

I'm so sorry, too. Losing someone is never easy. Just being around friends and family is the key now as is focusing on the good times that you had with your father.

Dead-Air · 07.27.2008, 02:17 AM

I can't begin to imagine how awful that must feel. Don't apologize for wanting to shout about it in some public place, here's as good as any.

Try not to blame yourself for the stuff in life that just sucks, you can't possibly be at fault for that.

alteredcourse · 07.27.2008, 02:33 AM

I'm appreciating this . It's odd because lately I was seeing clearly at how I gravitate towards to negatives in life . I figured it was becuase of a fear of being had . A fear of being fooled . A default .
I dont know . He was suppoesd to out live Jimmy Page, okay ? He really was . That was the guy he was supposed to out-duel some time . And he would have .

So I'm really trying to find some positives here. It's heavy boots . I dont know what to do or say .

Hed always try to walk me along the streets with me at the left because "back in the old days garbage would fall over the roofs onto the streets" and if I was positioned on the right then it would fall on him and take it for me .
Eventualy I heard that if you walk your daughter on the right it meant I am a hooker .
And on weekends me and my brother would sit with him while he played for extra change at the liquor store . I know we got him xtra points for children and all but it was nice to be apart of the action . He couldnt live without his Extra Old Stock and thats what took him down .
One beer in his hand , a joiint in the other .

I miss old-time things like that . Nothing I do these days seems to mean anything .Nothing anybody says has nothing to do with anything .

schizophrenicroom · 07.27.2008, 02:39 AM

i'm so sorry for your loss. it's perfect to feel lost and confused. when i lost my grandma in '06 nothing made sense for a long time and a lot of things still don't. just keep close with everyone you love and keep the good memories coming.

alteredcourse · 07.28.2008, 12:33 AM

Thank you very much.

DeadDiscoDildo · 07.28.2008, 01:11 AM

I can't say anything except that I'm sorry for your loss and It's the day we all dread. Keep yr head up.

07.27.2008, 01:37 AM	#1
alteredcourse expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,503	My dad died last night. He outlived his idols, outlived his mother and all his 8 older siblings, and outlived me. I can forgive him for the lifetime of tears ive bled for him because he is human but somehow I feel like I wont ever forgive myself. I'm sorry for putting this here, but I dont know what else to do.
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07.27.2008, 01:41 AM	#2
acousticrock87 invito al cielo Join Date: May 2006 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 5,515	Shit. I'm so sorry. My best friend's dad died unexpectedly about a year ago. I know that there's really nothing anyone can say to make things look brighter or whatever, but be around friends and family. You'll need some time to yourself to sort it out, too, but you need people around to share it with.
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07.27.2008, 02:07 AM	#3
MellySingsDoom invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 8,662	Holy Christ. The only thing I can say is that if you want to talk to anyone here, then please do so. My thoughts and ermpathies are with you. __________________ Snow on Easter Sunday - Jesus Christ in reverse.
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07.27.2008, 02:10 AM	#4
Sonic Youth 37 invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: if there is a bright spot in the universe, the farthest point from it Posts: 9,443	I'm so sorry, too. Losing someone is never easy. Just being around friends and family is the key now as is focusing on the good times that you had with your father. __________________ "One: Where's the fife? and Two: Gimme the fife."
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07.27.2008, 02:17 AM	#5
Dead-Air invito al cielo Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Portland OR Posts: 4,300	I can't begin to imagine how awful that must feel. Don't apologize for wanting to shout about it in some public place, here's as good as any. Try not to blame yourself for the stuff in life that just sucks, you can't possibly be at fault for that. __________________ FuckBook; My Band; My Radio Show; My Flickr Page; Science Fiction Message Board
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07.27.2008, 02:33 AM	#6
alteredcourse expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,503	I'm appreciating this . It's odd because lately I was seeing clearly at how I gravitate towards to negatives in life . I figured it was becuase of a fear of being had . A fear of being fooled . A default . I dont know . He was suppoesd to out live Jimmy Page, okay ? He really was . That was the guy he was supposed to out-duel some time . And he would have . So I'm really trying to find some positives here. It's heavy boots . I dont know what to do or say . Hed always try to walk me along the streets with me at the left because "back in the old days garbage would fall over the roofs onto the streets" and if I was positioned on the right then it would fall on him and take it for me . Eventualy I heard that if you walk your daughter on the right it meant I am a hooker . And on weekends me and my brother would sit with him while he played for extra change at the liquor store . I know we got him xtra points for children and all but it was nice to be apart of the action . He couldnt live without his Extra Old Stock and thats what took him down . One beer in his hand , a joiint in the other . I miss old-time things like that . Nothing I do these days seems to mean anything .Nothing anybody says has nothing to do with anything .
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07.27.2008, 02:39 AM	#7
schizophrenicroom invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: behind you Posts: 10,807	i'm so sorry for your loss. it's perfect to feel lost and confused. when i lost my grandma in '06 nothing made sense for a long time and a lot of things still don't. just keep close with everyone you love and keep the good memories coming. __________________ fuck i'm frustrated, freaking out something fierce, would you help me? i'm hungry and i stuffer and i startle, i struggle and i stammer til i'm up to my ears in miserable quote unquote "art"
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07.28.2008, 12:33 AM	#8
alteredcourse expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,503	Thank you very much.
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07.28.2008, 01:11 AM	#9
DeadDiscoDildo invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 3,805	I can't say anything except that I'm sorry for your loss and It's the day we all dread. Keep yr head up.
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