Favorite Film Comedy Lines

5Against1 · 10.08.2007, 07:24 AM

Mine is still the part of Raising Arizona where one of the the robbers asks the old man behind the counter..."Do these balloons blow up into funny shapes?" and the old man replies..."Not unless you think round is funny"...LMFAO!!! The Cohen Bros. rule.

alyasa · 10.08.2007, 07:39 AM

SPENGLER
I think he's saying that since we're about
to be sacrificed anyway, we get to choose
the form we want him to take.

STANTZ
You mean if I stand here and concentrate on
the image of Roberto Clemente, Gozer will
appear as Roberto Clemente and wipe us out?

SPENGLER
That appears to be the case.

VENKMAN
(quickly)
Don't think of anything yet. Clear your
minds. We only get one crack at this.

GOZER
The choice is made. The Traveller has come.

VENKMAN
(in a panic)
We didn't choose anything!
(to the others)
I didn't think of an image, did you?

SPENGLER
No.

They look at Winston.

WINSTON
My mind's a total void!

They all look at Stantz.

STANTZ
(guilty)
I couldn't help it! It just popped in
there!

VENKMAN
(desperately)
What? What popped in there?

STANTZ
(pointing)
Look!

VENKMAN
(desperately)
What is it? Ray, what did you think of?

STANTZ
(babbling)
It can't be! It can't be!

STANTZ
It's ... It's ... It's the STAY-PUFT
MARSHMALLOW MAN.

mangajunky · 10.08.2007, 08:35 AM

From the Marx Brothers - Duck Soup

Rufus T. Firefly: You're a brave man. Go and break through the lines. And remember, while you're out there risking your life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in be in here thinking what a sucker you are.

alyasa · 10.08.2007, 09:14 AM

Dr. Strangelove: "It would not be difficult, Mein Fuhrer! Nuclear reactors could.....oh, I'm sorry - Mr. President........

5Against1 · 10.08.2007, 09:35 AM

"We have to get this man to a hospital"..."What is it?"... "A big white building with doctors and patients, but's that not important now."

the ikara cult · 10.08.2007, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alyasa

Dr. Strangelove: "It would not be difficult, Mein Fuhrer! Nuclear reactors could.....oh, I'm sorry - Mr. President........

From the same film

"You can't fight in here, this is the War room"

Savage Clone · 10.08.2007, 11:48 AM

Yep, you just cut 'em up like regular chickens.

Silent Dan Speaks · 10.08.2007, 11:59 AM

"Not my Brain! That's my second favorite organ!"

themawt71 · 10.08.2007, 12:14 PM

MARGE
Where you girls from?

HOOKER ONE
Chaska.

HOOKER TWO
LeSeure. But I went to high school
in White Bear Lake. Go Bears...

MARGE
Okay, I want you to tell me what
these fellas looked like.

HOOKER ONE
Well, the little guy, he was
kinda funny-looking.

MARGE
In what way?

HOOKER ONE
I dunno. Just funny-looking.

MARGE
Can you be any more specific?

HOOKER ONE
I couldn't really say. He wasn't
circumcised.

MARGE
Was he funny-looking apart from
that?

HOOKER ONE
Yah.

MARGE
So you were having sex with the
little fella, then?

HOOKER ONE
Uh-huh.

MARGE
Is there anything else you can
tell me about him?

HOOKER ONE
No. Like I say, he was funny-looking.
More'n most people even.

MARGE
And what about the other fella?

HOOKER TWO
He was a little older. Looked like
the Marlboro man.

MARGE
Yah?

HOOKER TWO
Yah. Maybe I'm sayin' that cause
he smoked Marlboros.

MARGE
Uh-huh.

HOOKER TWO
A subconscious-type thing.

MARGE
Yah, that can happen.

HOOKER TWO
Yah.

HOOKER ONE
They said they were goin' to the
Twin Cities?

MARGE
Oh, yah?

HOOKER TWO
Yah.

HOOKER ONE
Yah. Is that useful to ya?

MARGE
Oh, you bet, yah.

LittlePuppetBoy · 10.08.2007, 01:04 PM

Kumar: So how were Jessica Alba's tits?
Rosenberg: You know about the Holocaust?
Kumar: Yeah...
Rosenberg: Picture the exact opposite of that.

Sheriff Rhys Chatham · 10.08.2007, 03:53 PM

Suber bad

Girl: you scratch our backs and we'll scratch yours.
guy: well lucky for you, my back is on my penis.

king_buzzo · 10.09.2007, 04:48 AM

japanese japanese japanese japaneese japanese

he wants more intensity

thats all he said?

LifeDistortion · 10.09.2007, 11:43 AM

"Airplane" and "The Naked Gun" are probobly the most chocked full of classic one liners then just about any movie since The Marx Brothers.

mangajunky · 10.09.2007, 12:52 PM

Jimmy - Quadrophenia

I don't wanna be the same as everybody else. That's why I'm a Mod, see?

========================================
THAT is Comedy!

10.08.2007, 07:24 AM	#1
5Against1 bad moon rising Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Canastota, NY USA Posts: 147	Mine is still the part of Raising Arizona where one of the the robbers asks the old man behind the counter..."Do these balloons blow up into funny shapes?" and the old man replies..."Not unless you think round is funny"...LMFAO!!! The Cohen Bros. rule. __________________ "...If nothing is everything, then I will have it all..."
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 07:39 AM	#2
alyasa invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Singapore Posts: 3,791	SPENGLER I think he's saying that since we're about to be sacrificed anyway, we get to choose the form we want him to take. STANTZ You mean if I stand here and concentrate on the image of Roberto Clemente, Gozer will appear as Roberto Clemente and wipe us out? SPENGLER That appears to be the case. VENKMAN (quickly) Don't think of anything yet. Clear your minds. We only get one crack at this. GOZER The choice is made. The Traveller has come. VENKMAN (in a panic) We didn't choose anything! (to the others) I didn't think of an image, did you? SPENGLER No. They look at Winston. WINSTON My mind's a total void! They all look at Stantz. STANTZ (guilty) I couldn't help it! It just popped in there! VENKMAN (desperately) What? What popped in there? STANTZ (pointing) Look! VENKMAN (desperately) What is it? Ray, what did you think of? STANTZ (babbling) It can't be! It can't be! STANTZ It's ... It's ... It's the STAY-PUFT MARSHMALLOW MAN. __________________ Sab Kuch Tick Tock Hai
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 08:35 AM	#3
mangajunky expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Englewood, NJ Posts: 1,247	From the Marx Brothers - Duck Soup Rufus T. Firefly: You're a brave man. Go and break through the lines. And remember, while you're out there risking your life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in be in here thinking what a sucker you are. __________________ -Franky Don't let yer meat loaf.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 09:14 AM	#4
alyasa invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Singapore Posts: 3,791	Dr. Strangelove: "It would not be difficult, Mein Fuhrer! Nuclear reactors could.....oh, I'm sorry - Mr. President........ __________________ Sab Kuch Tick Tock Hai
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 09:35 AM	#5
5Against1 bad moon rising Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Canastota, NY USA Posts: 147	"We have to get this man to a hospital"..."What is it?"... "A big white building with doctors and patients, but's that not important now." __________________ "...If nothing is everything, then I will have it all..."
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 11:48 AM	#7
Savage Clone invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 11,290	Yep, you just cut 'em up like regular chickens.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 11:59 AM	#8
Silent Dan Speaks the destroyed room Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 603	"Not my Brain! That's my second favorite organ!"
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 12:14 PM	#9
themawt71 the destroyed room Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: chicago Posts: 570	MARGE Where you girls from? HOOKER ONE Chaska. HOOKER TWO LeSeure. But I went to high school in White Bear Lake. Go Bears... MARGE Okay, I want you to tell me what these fellas looked like. HOOKER ONE Well, the little guy, he was kinda funny-looking. MARGE In what way? HOOKER ONE I dunno. Just funny-looking. MARGE Can you be any more specific? HOOKER ONE I couldn't really say. He wasn't circumcised. MARGE Was he funny-looking apart from that? HOOKER ONE Yah. MARGE So you were having sex with the little fella, then? HOOKER ONE Uh-huh. MARGE Is there anything else you can tell me about him? HOOKER ONE No. Like I say, he was funny-looking. More'n most people even. MARGE And what about the other fella? HOOKER TWO He was a little older. Looked like the Marlboro man. MARGE Yah? HOOKER TWO Yah. Maybe I'm sayin' that cause he smoked Marlboros. MARGE Uh-huh. HOOKER TWO A subconscious-type thing. MARGE Yah, that can happen. HOOKER TWO Yah. HOOKER ONE They said they were goin' to the Twin Cities? MARGE Oh, yah? HOOKER TWO Yah. HOOKER ONE Yah. Is that useful to ya? MARGE Oh, you bet, yah.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 01:04 PM	#10
LittlePuppetBoy expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Aylmer(now Gatineau), Quebec Posts: 1,756	Kumar: So how were Jessica Alba's tits? Rosenberg: You know about the Holocaust? Kumar: Yeah... Rosenberg: Picture the exact opposite of that. __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.08.2007, 03:53 PM	#11
Sheriff Rhys Chatham invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: New England. Posts: 4,027	Suber bad Girl: you scratch our backs and we'll scratch yours. guy: well lucky for you, my back is on my penis. __________________ My Music(grunge rock) A part of this blue shit since June 24th, 2004
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.09.2007, 04:48 AM	#12
king_buzzo invito al cielo Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 11,110	japanese japanese japanese japaneese japanese he wants more intensity thats all he said?
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.09.2007, 11:43 AM	#13
LifeDistortion expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: CA Posts: 2,457	"Airplane" and "The Naked Gun" are probobly the most chocked full of classic one liners then just about any movie since The Marx Brothers.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.09.2007, 12:52 PM	#14
mangajunky expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Englewood, NJ Posts: 1,247	Jimmy - Quadrophenia I don't wanna be the same as everybody else. That's why I'm a Mod, see? ======================================== THAT is Comedy! __________________ -Franky Don't let yer meat loaf.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|