What's your penis type?

atari 2600 · 10.23.2006, 10:05 AM

Phalloanalysis, or lingam gnosis, is an ancient art of personality assessment based upon the idea that there are four types of penises named for each of the four elements of the ancient world:

Earth
Air
Fire
Water

Most penises represent a combination of two of these types and, consequently, their owners share the characteristics of the two.

Earth penis
Earth penises look like yams, potatoes, turnips, or other tuberous vegetables. Unusually large, earth penises tend to be of an irregular shape and exhibit dark pigmentation. Earth penises are associated with large, hirsute, pendulous testicles.The earth penis' owner tends to be of a homely appearance and a pragmatic nature and is apt to be a farmer. He is the domnant partner in any relationship. A down-to-earth individual, the earth penis owner has simple, ordinary, everyday tastes, in sex as in other areas of his interest and activity. Chances are that he is of only average or below-average intelligence.

Air penis
The air penis is likely to be long, to be slender, to be of a light complexion, and to have a bend in its shaft. The small, round, lightly pigmented testicles associated with the air penis are carried close to the body, indicating a cold nature. Who owns the air penis? The artist. More specifically, although an intelligent and imaginative lover, he is an artist who is likely to be bisexual and to have difficulty making and keeping commitments, being of an adulterous and fickle character.

Fire penis
The fire penis is thick, smooth straight, symmetrical, and hot pink to red in color, indicative of its owner's fiery sexuality and his aggressive, controlling nature.

Water penis
Small and soft, the water penis is the most feminine of the four types of phalli. Although they tend to be nuturing men who enjoy doing tasks that are usually considered "woman's work," such as cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children. However, the water penis owner has a strong, active libido and may prove too much of a man for many would-be partners.

http://www.otoons.com/astrology/Lingam_gnosis.html

Rob Instigator · 10.23.2006, 10:13 AM

I have Fire Penis, and Earth balls

Tokolosh · 10.23.2006, 10:13 AM

A combination of the air and fire penis. Mostly air though.
The earth one is scary!! Yams, potatoes, turnips, or other tuberous vegetables?? Word!

HaydenAsche · 10.23.2006, 10:14 AM

Mostly fire.

Savage Clone · 10.23.2006, 10:15 AM

I don't think I like seeing the term "tuberous" in the same sentence that describes penises.

jon boy · 10.23.2006, 10:17 AM

does anyone play air penis?

HaydenAsche · 10.23.2006, 10:18 AM

I'm fairly good at giving air blowjobs. Mostly due to my practice of giving real ones.

Tokolosh · 10.23.2006, 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jon boy

does anyone play air penis?

All the time Jono, and it doesn't need tuning either.
Now answer the damn question! Everyone's waiting to hear what you've got.

jon boy · 10.23.2006, 10:21 AM

air and fire i think. oh and huge obviously.

king_buzzo · 10.23.2006, 10:31 AM

SpectralJulianIsNotDead · 10.23.2006, 10:54 AM

Fire and water. So I guess I have an ash penis. It's shape is described by fire, but it is just as pale as the rest of my skin and I do enjoy cooking and taking care of children. And I'm one horny bastard. I really love the vagina.

Iain · 10.24.2006, 02:27 AM

Good grief!

I don't know if my cock fits any of those physical descriptions but my personality probably mostly fits that of the water penis

Phlegmscope · 10.24.2006, 02:40 AM

Mine is more like dark matter -penis. It can't be seen, it can't be felt but you know it's there.

Tokolosh · 10.24.2006, 03:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phlegmscope

Mine is more like dark matter -penis. It can't be seen, it can't be felt but you know it's there.

Dark matter? What? Do you possess a black hole?

Phlegmscope · 10.24.2006, 03:25 AM

I mean exactly what I mean!

Iain · 10.24.2006, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nefeli

iain! and this is one of best replies-posts ever.
and you do or you have to know that girls melt when hear stuff like that.

What, that my penis is small and soft!?

Inhuman · 10.24.2006, 11:10 AM

Earth...but potato?

LittlePuppetBoy · 10.24.2006, 11:31 AM

I will say earth

Toilet & Bowels · 10.24.2006, 11:43 AM

i have air plus solid steel

10.23.2006, 10:05 AM	#1
atari 2600 invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 8,212	Phalloanalysis, or lingam gnosis, is an ancient art of personality assessment based upon the idea that there are four types of penises named for each of the four elements of the ancient world: Earth Air Fire Water Most penises represent a combination of two of these types and, consequently, their owners share the characteristics of the two. Earth penis Earth penises look like yams, potatoes, turnips, or other tuberous vegetables. Unusually large, earth penises tend to be of an irregular shape and exhibit dark pigmentation. Earth penises are associated with large, hirsute, pendulous testicles.The earth penis' owner tends to be of a homely appearance and a pragmatic nature and is apt to be a farmer. He is the domnant partner in any relationship. A down-to-earth individual, the earth penis owner has simple, ordinary, everyday tastes, in sex as in other areas of his interest and activity. Chances are that he is of only average or below-average intelligence. Air penis The air penis is likely to be long, to be slender, to be of a light complexion, and to have a bend in its shaft. The small, round, lightly pigmented testicles associated with the air penis are carried close to the body, indicating a cold nature. Who owns the air penis? The artist. More specifically, although an intelligent and imaginative lover, he is an artist who is likely to be bisexual and to have difficulty making and keeping commitments, being of an adulterous and fickle character. Fire penis The fire penis is thick, smooth straight, symmetrical, and hot pink to red in color, indicative of its owner's fiery sexuality and his aggressive, controlling nature. Water penis Small and soft, the water penis is the most feminine of the four types of phalli. Although they tend to be nuturing men who enjoy doing tasks that are usually considered "woman's work," such as cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children. However, the water penis owner has a strong, active libido and may prove too much of a man for many would-be partners. http://www.otoons.com/astrology/Lingam_gnosis.html __________________ Robert Rauschenberg, Canyon, 1959. Combine on canvas 81 3/4 x 70 x 24 inches.
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10.23.2006, 10:13 AM	#2
Rob Instigator invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: In the land of the Instigator Posts: 27,976	I have Fire Penis, and Earth balls __________________ RXTT's Intellectual Journey - my new blog where I talk about all the books I read.
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10.23.2006, 10:13 AM	#3
Tokolosh invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Plaza de Toros Posts: 6,731	A combination of the air and fire penis. Mostly air though. The earth one is scary!! Yams, potatoes, turnips, or other tuberous vegetables?? Word! __________________ Anything you can /imagine is real
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10.23.2006, 10:14 AM	#4
HaydenAsche invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 10,755	Mostly fire. __________________ rip
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10.23.2006, 10:15 AM	#5
Savage Clone invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 11,290	I don't think I like seeing the term "tuberous" in the same sentence that describes penises.
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10.23.2006, 10:17 AM	#6
jon boy invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: psycho battery Posts: 12,161	does anyone play air penis? __________________ Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing \|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration V _ \ / _ PING <-------- moments later / \ http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhxq...isruo1_500.gif
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10.23.2006, 10:18 AM	#7
HaydenAsche invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 10,755	I'm fairly good at giving air blowjobs. Mostly due to my practice of giving real ones. __________________ rip
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10.23.2006, 10:21 AM	#9
jon boy invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: psycho battery Posts: 12,161	air and fire i think. oh and huge obviously. __________________ Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing \|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration V _ \ / _ PING <-------- moments later / \ http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhxq...isruo1_500.gif
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10.23.2006, 10:31 AM	#10
king_buzzo invito al cielo Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 11,110	air
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10.23.2006, 10:54 AM	#11
SpectralJulianIsNotDead invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 7,409	Fire and water. So I guess I have an ash penis. It's shape is described by fire, but it is just as pale as the rest of my skin and I do enjoy cooking and taking care of children. And I'm one horny bastard. I really love the vagina.
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10.24.2006, 02:27 AM	#12
Iain invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 2,544	Good grief! I don't know if my cock fits any of those physical descriptions but my personality probably mostly fits that of the water penis
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10.24.2006, 02:40 AM	#13
Phlegmscope expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Finland Posts: 1,246	Mine is more like dark matter -penis. It can't be seen, it can't be felt but you know it's there.
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10.24.2006, 03:25 AM	#15
Phlegmscope expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Finland Posts: 1,246	I mean exactly what I mean!
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10.24.2006, 11:10 AM	#17
Inhuman invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Montreal Posts: 5,807	Earth...but potato? __________________ Inhuman no longer dwells on here. http://about.me/robinbastien
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10.24.2006, 11:31 AM	#18
LittlePuppetBoy expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Aylmer(now Gatineau), Quebec Posts: 1,756	I will say earth __________________
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10.24.2006, 11:43 AM	#19
Toilet & Bowels invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Northern Europe Posts: 12,273	i have air plus solid steel
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