By Popular Demand: The Sober Thread!

Intellivision · 10.27.2006, 11:15 AM

Yay! A space for all the sober people!

Extoll us with the virtues of the straight-edge lifestyle!

Tokolosh · 10.27.2006, 11:20 AM

Um?......................*leaves the thread in a hurry*

sonicl · 10.27.2006, 11:31 AM

Intellivision! You're here!

Normally you arrive about two hours earlier than this, I was getting worried about you.

gmku · 10.27.2006, 11:48 AM

Intellivision, you're driving me to drink....

Absinthe Goblin · 05.28.2007, 12:14 AM

Me conduire pour boire de l'absinthe et je toujours apprécierai la bonté de cela.

Oh peut-être je serai obligé à être sobre si postant ici?

SuchFriendsAreDangerous · 05.28.2007, 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Intellivision

Yay! A space for all the sober people!

Extoll us with the virtues of the straight-edge lifestyle!

ploesj · 05.28.2007, 05:16 AM

i don't drink alcohol. got some healthy liver here.

MellySingsDoom · 05.28.2007, 06:10 AM

I do drink the alcohol. In fact, thanks to over-imbibing last night at a gig in Kings Cross, I have a bit of a hangover. Still, musn't grumble, that's the British way, don't you know.

demonrail666 · 05.28.2007, 06:15 AM

To drink the alcohol is to laugh in the face of death and to lick one's lips at the sight of a nice juicy doner kebab with extra chilli sauce.

sonicl · 05.28.2007, 06:23 AM

I'm typing this while sober.

king_buzzo · 05.28.2007, 06:42 AM

GOOD OPPORTUNITY PLEASE READ!
If you don't believe this can work... Read the letters after the instructions!
MAKE PENIS FAST!!!

INSTRUCTIONS

Follow these instructions EXACTLY, and in 20 to 60 days you will have received well over 50,000 inches of penis, all yours. This program has remained successful because of the inadequacy and vanity of the participants. Please continue its success by carefully adhering to the instructions.
Welcome to the world of Mail Order Penis Enlargement! This little business is a little different than most cosmetic surgery. Your product is not solid (sic) and tangible, but rather a service. You are in the business of extending penii. Many small of endowment are happy to pay big bucks for this service. (The money made from the penis enlargement is secondary to the income which is made from people like yourself requesting that they be included in that list.)
1) Immediately cut off your penis at the base.
2) Cut off the head of your penis, and pack it in ice.
3) Take the remaining midsection of your penis, and cut it into 5 pieces of equal length.
4) Immediately mail each piece to the first 5 names listed below starting at number 1 through number 5. Send penis only please (total investment your penis). Enclose a note with each piece stating: "Please add my name to your mailing list." (This is a legitimate service that you are requesting and you are paying your penis for this service).
2) Remove the name that appears number 1 on the list. Move the other 9 names up one position. (Number 2 will become number 1 and number 3 will become number 2, etc.) Place your name, address and zip code in the number 10 position.
3) Post the new letter with your name in the number 10 position into 10 (Ten) separate bulletin boards in the message base or to the file section, call the file, MAKE.PENIS.FAST.
4) Within 60 days you will receive over 50,000 inches of PENIS. Keep a copy of this file for yourself so that you can use it again and again whenever you need penis enlargement. As soon as you mail out these letters you are automatically in the mail order business and people are sending you their penis to be placed on your mailing list. This list can then be rented to a reconstructive cosmetic surgeon that can be found in the Yellow Pages for additional income on a regular basis. The list will become more valuable as it grows in size. This is a service. This is perfectly legal. If you have any doubts, refer to Title 18, Sec. 1302 & 1341 of the postal lottery laws.

NOTE:
Make sure you retain EVERY Name and Address sent to you, either on computer or hard copy, but do not discard the names and notes they send you. This is PROOF that you are truly providing a service and should the AMA, FDA, or some other Government Agency question you, you can provide them with this proof!

Remember as each post is downloaded and the instructions carefully followed, five members will be reimbursed for their participation as a Penis Enlarger with one inch of penis each. Your name will move up the list geometrically so that when your name reaches the number five position you will be receiving thousands of inches in penis.
1. Daniel J. Karnes 6394-B Tawney Bloom Mogi Donuts, MD 21045
2. Emil T. Chuck 6394-A Tawney Bloom Mogi Donuts, MD 21045
3. Charles Whatson 7690 Karnesville Road Phobic, MI 48348
4. William Davenant 8295 Hiding Closet Rd Clarkston, MI 48348
5. Peter Ruckman 14805 Rivercrest Sterling Hts., MI 48312
6. Steven Crisp 3718 Kings Point Troy, MI 48083
7. Mark Gengler 5748 Patterson Troy, MI 48098
8. Pat Robertson 666 God's Little Homophobe Road Anti-Christ Hills, VA 48307
9. Fred Phelps 14-U Our Saviour of the Closet Lane Orchard Lake, MI 48323
10. Jesse Helms 20840 Tobacco Mercenary Street Lung Cancer Hacks., VA 48038
Dear Friend,
My name is Daniel J. Karnes. In September 1988 my life was repressed and the bible thumpers were hounding me like you wouldn't believe. I was never laid and my mental disability checks had run out. The only escape I had from the pressure of failure was my Apple computer and my bible. I longed to turn my fixation into my vocation.
This January 1989 my family and I went on a ten day cruise to the tropics. I bought a Double-Wide Trailer with CASH in February 1989. I am currently building a Self-Worship Temple on the West Coast of Florida, with a private S/M Dungeon with room for all of my closeted friends, and a beautiful view of the bay from my women's shoes closet and wardrobe. I will never be underendowed again. Today I am equipped! I have over 400,000 inches of penis (33,333 feet and 4 inches! ) to date and will become a million-incher within 4 or 5 months. Anyone can do the same. This penis enlargement making program works perfectly every time, 100% of the time. I have NEVER failed to earn 50,000 inches or more whenever I wanted. Best of all you never have to leave home except to go to your mailbox or reconstructive surgeon.
In October 1988, I received a letter in the mail telling me how I could earn 50,000 inches of penis or more whenever I wanted. I was naturally very skeptical and threw the letter on the desk next to my computer. It's funny though, when you are desperately underendowed, backed into a corner, your mind does crazy things. I spent a frustrating day looking through the want ads for a wife who didn't need sexual fulfilment. The pickings were sparse at best. That night I tried to unwind by booting up my Apple computer and calling several gay bulletin boards. I read several of the message posts and then glanced at the letter next to the computer. All at once it came to me, I now had the key to my dreams.
I realized that with the power of the computer I could expand and enhance this penis making formula into the most unbelievable penis enlargement generator that has ever been created. I substituted the computer bulletin boards in place of the post office and electronically did by computer what others were doing 100% by mail. Now only a few letters are mailed manually. Most of the hard work is speedily downloaded to other bulletin boards throughout the world. If you believe that someday you deserve that lucky break that you have waited for all your life, simply follow the easy instructions below. Your dreams will come true.
Sincerely yours,
Daniel J. Karnes
-- Why doesn't Wenchell's
-- Serve Mogi Donuts?
About six months ago I received the enclosed post in letter form. I ignored it. I received about five more of the same letter within the next two weeks. I ignored them also. Of course, I was tempted to follow through and dreamed of making thousands of inches, but I was convinced it was just another gimmick and could not possibly work. I was wrong! About three weeks later I saw this same letter posted on a local bulletin board in Montreal. I liked the idea of giving it a try with my computer. I didn't expect much because I figured, if other people were as skeptical as I, they wouldn't be too quick to part with their penis. But, I buy lottery tickets weekly in my province and have nothing to show for it but ticket stubs. This week I decided to look at this as my weekly lottery purchase. I addressed the envelopes and mailed out one piece of my penis in each as directed. Two weeks went by and I didn't receive anything in the mail. The fourth week rolled around and I couldn't believe what happened! I can't say I received 50,000 inches, but it was definitely well over 35,000! For the first time in all my years, I was adequately endowed. It was great. Of course, it didn't take me long to feel inadequate again so I am using this excellent penis enlargement opportunity once again. Follow the instructions and get ready to enjoy.
Please send a copy of this letter along with the enclosed letter so together we can convince people who are skeptical that it really works!
Good Luck,
Charles R. Whatson
St Agathe Que.

sonicl · 05.28.2007, 06:52 AM

Oh, man, I am SO sober right now.

I'm gonna go and have a glass of water.

Danny Himself · 05.28.2007, 07:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sonicl

Oh, man, I am SO sober right now.

I'm gonna go and have a glass of water.

Roflcopter.

king_buzzo · 05.28.2007, 07:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Danny Himself

Roflcopter.

And its counterpart, L0LMOBIL.

Danny Himself · 05.28.2007, 07:27 AM

We really are in the space age now, huh? Vehicles powered by mere humour.

HECKLER SPRAY · 05.28.2007, 07:29 AM

This thread looks to be exciting... Woaw !!!

HECKLER SPRAY · 05.28.2007, 07:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Intellivision

Yay! A space for all the sober people!

Extoll us with the virtues of the straight-edge lifestyle!

It's for you :
http://www.straightedgelifestyle.com/
enjoy !
(It's not my cup of tea)

king_buzzo · 05.28.2007, 07:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HECKLER SPRAY

This thread looks to be exciting... Woaw !!!

HECKLER SPRAY · 05.28.2007, 08:06 AM

... cause of his straight-edge lifestyle.

king_buzzo · 05.28.2007, 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HECKLER SPRAY

... cause of his straight-edge lifestyle.

cause of his sober lifestyle.

10.27.2006, 11:15 AM	#1
Intellivision i'm a rotten little fuck Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 347	Yay! A space for all the sober people! Extoll us with the virtues of the straight-edge lifestyle!
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.27.2006, 11:20 AM	#2
Tokolosh invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Plaza de Toros Posts: 6,731	Um?......................leaves the thread in a hurry __________________ Anything you can /imagine is real
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.27.2006, 11:31 AM	#3
sonicl invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 9,527	Intellivision! You're here! Normally you arrive about two hours earlier than this, I was getting worried about you.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

10.27.2006, 11:48 AM	#4
gmku invito al cielo Join Date: May 2006 Location: Oxford, England Posts: 15,225	Intellivision, you're driving me to drink.... __________________ Ever notice how this place just basically, well, sucks.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 12:14 AM	#5
Absinthe Goblin little trouble girl Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 46	Me conduire pour boire de l'absinthe et je toujours apprécierai la bonté de cela. Oh peut-être je serai obligé à être sobre si postant ici?
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 05:16 AM	#7
ploesj invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: antwerp. Posts: 2,901	i don't drink alcohol. got some healthy liver here. __________________ blog flickr
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 06:10 AM	#8
MellySingsDoom invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 8,662	I do drink the alcohol. In fact, thanks to over-imbibing last night at a gig in Kings Cross, I have a bit of a hangover. Still, musn't grumble, that's the British way, don't you know. __________________ Snow on Easter Sunday - Jesus Christ in reverse.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 06:15 AM	#9
demonrail666 invito al cielo Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 18,510	To drink the alcohol is to laugh in the face of death and to lick one's lips at the sight of a nice juicy doner kebab with extra chilli sauce.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 06:23 AM	#10
sonicl invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 9,527	I'm typing this while sober.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 06:42 AM	#11
king_buzzo invito al cielo Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 11,110	GOOD OPPORTUNITY PLEASE READ! If you don't believe this can work... Read the letters after the instructions! MAKE PENIS FAST!!! INSTRUCTIONS Follow these instructions EXACTLY, and in 20 to 60 days you will have received well over 50,000 inches of penis, all yours. This program has remained successful because of the inadequacy and vanity of the participants. Please continue its success by carefully adhering to the instructions. Welcome to the world of Mail Order Penis Enlargement! This little business is a little different than most cosmetic surgery. Your product is not solid (sic) and tangible, but rather a service. You are in the business of extending penii. Many small of endowment are happy to pay big bucks for this service. (The money made from the penis enlargement is secondary to the income which is made from people like yourself requesting that they be included in that list.) 1) Immediately cut off your penis at the base. 2) Cut off the head of your penis, and pack it in ice. 3) Take the remaining midsection of your penis, and cut it into 5 pieces of equal length. 4) Immediately mail each piece to the first 5 names listed below starting at number 1 through number 5. Send penis only please (total investment your penis). Enclose a note with each piece stating: "Please add my name to your mailing list." (This is a legitimate service that you are requesting and you are paying your penis for this service). 2) Remove the name that appears number 1 on the list. Move the other 9 names up one position. (Number 2 will become number 1 and number 3 will become number 2, etc.) Place your name, address and zip code in the number 10 position. 3) Post the new letter with your name in the number 10 position into 10 (Ten) separate bulletin boards in the message base or to the file section, call the file, MAKE.PENIS.FAST. 4) Within 60 days you will receive over 50,000 inches of PENIS. Keep a copy of this file for yourself so that you can use it again and again whenever you need penis enlargement. As soon as you mail out these letters you are automatically in the mail order business and people are sending you their penis to be placed on your mailing list. This list can then be rented to a reconstructive cosmetic surgeon that can be found in the Yellow Pages for additional income on a regular basis. The list will become more valuable as it grows in size. This is a service. This is perfectly legal. If you have any doubts, refer to Title 18, Sec. 1302 & 1341 of the postal lottery laws. NOTE: Make sure you retain EVERY Name and Address sent to you, either on computer or hard copy, but do not discard the names and notes they send you. This is PROOF that you are truly providing a service and should the AMA, FDA, or some other Government Agency question you, you can provide them with this proof! Remember as each post is downloaded and the instructions carefully followed, five members will be reimbursed for their participation as a Penis Enlarger with one inch of penis each. Your name will move up the list geometrically so that when your name reaches the number five position you will be receiving thousands of inches in penis. 1. Daniel J. Karnes 6394-B Tawney Bloom Mogi Donuts, MD 21045 2. Emil T. Chuck 6394-A Tawney Bloom Mogi Donuts, MD 21045 3. Charles Whatson 7690 Karnesville Road Phobic, MI 48348 4. William Davenant 8295 Hiding Closet Rd Clarkston, MI 48348 5. Peter Ruckman 14805 Rivercrest Sterling Hts., MI 48312 6. Steven Crisp 3718 Kings Point Troy, MI 48083 7. Mark Gengler 5748 Patterson Troy, MI 48098 8. Pat Robertson 666 God's Little Homophobe Road Anti-Christ Hills, VA 48307 9. Fred Phelps 14-U Our Saviour of the Closet Lane Orchard Lake, MI 48323 10. Jesse Helms 20840 Tobacco Mercenary Street Lung Cancer Hacks., VA 48038 Dear Friend, My name is Daniel J. Karnes. In September 1988 my life was repressed and the bible thumpers were hounding me like you wouldn't believe. I was never laid and my mental disability checks had run out. The only escape I had from the pressure of failure was my Apple computer and my bible. I longed to turn my fixation into my vocation. This January 1989 my family and I went on a ten day cruise to the tropics. I bought a Double-Wide Trailer with CASH in February 1989. I am currently building a Self-Worship Temple on the West Coast of Florida, with a private S/M Dungeon with room for all of my closeted friends, and a beautiful view of the bay from my women's shoes closet and wardrobe. I will never be underendowed again. Today I am equipped! I have over 400,000 inches of penis (33,333 feet and 4 inches! ) to date and will become a million-incher within 4 or 5 months. Anyone can do the same. This penis enlargement making program works perfectly every time, 100% of the time. I have NEVER failed to earn 50,000 inches or more whenever I wanted. Best of all you never have to leave home except to go to your mailbox or reconstructive surgeon. In October 1988, I received a letter in the mail telling me how I could earn 50,000 inches of penis or more whenever I wanted. I was naturally very skeptical and threw the letter on the desk next to my computer. It's funny though, when you are desperately underendowed, backed into a corner, your mind does crazy things. I spent a frustrating day looking through the want ads for a wife who didn't need sexual fulfilment. The pickings were sparse at best. That night I tried to unwind by booting up my Apple computer and calling several gay bulletin boards. I read several of the message posts and then glanced at the letter next to the computer. All at once it came to me, I now had the key to my dreams. I realized that with the power of the computer I could expand and enhance this penis making formula into the most unbelievable penis enlargement generator that has ever been created. I substituted the computer bulletin boards in place of the post office and electronically did by computer what others were doing 100% by mail. Now only a few letters are mailed manually. Most of the hard work is speedily downloaded to other bulletin boards throughout the world. If you believe that someday you deserve that lucky break that you have waited for all your life, simply follow the easy instructions below. Your dreams will come true. Sincerely yours, Daniel J. Karnes -- Why doesn't Wenchell's -- Serve Mogi Donuts? About six months ago I received the enclosed post in letter form. I ignored it. I received about five more of the same letter within the next two weeks. I ignored them also. Of course, I was tempted to follow through and dreamed of making thousands of inches, but I was convinced it was just another gimmick and could not possibly work. I was wrong! About three weeks later I saw this same letter posted on a local bulletin board in Montreal. I liked the idea of giving it a try with my computer. I didn't expect much because I figured, if other people were as skeptical as I, they wouldn't be too quick to part with their penis. But, I buy lottery tickets weekly in my province and have nothing to show for it but ticket stubs. This week I decided to look at this as my weekly lottery purchase. I addressed the envelopes and mailed out one piece of my penis in each as directed. Two weeks went by and I didn't receive anything in the mail. The fourth week rolled around and I couldn't believe what happened! I can't say I received 50,000 inches, but it was definitely well over 35,000! For the first time in all my years, I was adequately endowed. It was great. Of course, it didn't take me long to feel inadequate again so I am using this excellent penis enlargement opportunity once again. Follow the instructions and get ready to enjoy. Please send a copy of this letter along with the enclosed letter so together we can convince people who are skeptical that it really works! Good Luck, Charles R. Whatson St Agathe Que.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 06:52 AM	#12
sonicl invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 9,527	Oh, man, I am SO sober right now. I'm gonna go and have a glass of water.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 07:27 AM	#15
Danny Himself invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 9,623	We really are in the space age now, huh? Vehicles powered by mere humour.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 07:29 AM	#16
HECKLER SPRAY invito al cielo Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Near Paris, France Posts: 3,762	This thread looks to be exciting... Woaw !!! __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2007, 08:06 AM	#19
HECKLER SPRAY invito al cielo Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Near Paris, France Posts: 3,762	... cause of his straight-edge lifestyle. __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|