[floatingslowly]

o rly?

try Disturbed covering Land of Confusion (live).

[pao-lino]

 

 

 

 

rather than

Alprazolam

Bromazepam

Chlordiazepoxide

Cinolazepam
Cloxazolam
Clorazepate
Diazepam
Estazolam
Flunitrazepam
Flurazepam
Flutoprazepam
Halazepam
Ketazolam
Alprazolam
Bromazepam
Chlordiazepoxide
Cinolazepam
Clonazepam
Cloxazolam
Clorazepate
Diazepam
Estazolam
Flunitrazepam
Flurazepam
Flutoprazepam
Halazepam
etc.

for your little blues and anxiety.
can you believe so many of us are diagnosed agoraphobics? in the last 10 years what a boom...
But it's incredible how we have been convinced we need all these drugs.
We think the mood is cerebral... check you glands (tyroid, surrenals...) first before spending hundreds of dollar for doped chatting with a therapist.
I'll be doctor soon, probably neurologist. I'll try not to dope 20yo kids turning them into sleepy shy shy mice.

About drug (illegal substances) dependence, I've assisted in the last 4 years to the decay of some "friends of friends". Here (north italy) heroin strikes back.
My neighbour died about 5 years ago for an heart attack, he was a 42, single, handsome, addicted to coke financial agent. he died in a hotel, very sad.
My mother's cousin, back in 70's, had some problems with heroin, just like most of bored youth of that time. He's clean (or at least, he's fine) now. Lives in Zanzibar and works as a canoe teacher, ha.

[Cantankerous]

Originally Posted by pao-lino

 

 

 

 

i'm sorry but i just cannot abide that shit. it may work but i ain't doing it cuz i hate it. haaaaaate it.

[Kyle]

I find it awesome what you're doing shentov.
And the open way you talk about it. Wish you the best.

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

oh yeah--people-- fuck them-- they don't know shit. for me talking to my family just was all about denial and bullshit. cos you know, parents don't want to admit they fucked up, friends are as ignorant as one is, family wants to gloss over shit... so fuck them.n they want to keep you sick out of convenience, ignorance, and sheer habit.

i got cured by a shrink. nobody else could. and i had to shop around-- some shrinks were assholes, some were religious fucks, some were clueless,one was a lecherous bitch, etc., but eventually i found a competent, smart, old, well-read shrink who, while a little wackadoodle himself, understood me well enough to show me the way back to sanity-- it was quite simple really once i found the way, and i'm forever grateful. yeah i had to keep trying but i really was sick and tired of being sick and tired, so... i keep pushing until i found the way.

btw what you discuss about just being listened to without being judged, that's mostly what people in support groups do. i'm not much of a group person so individual shrink sessions worked best for me, but i know people who've been helped by groups like that-- again i'd say is a matter of wanting to get better, shopping around, and making the effort. because there's help out there no doubt. but again it's not the ignorant civilian fucks (who just want to maintain good appearances) who will help-- it's the ones who can admit that things are fucked up and look at it with you that will really lend you a hand.

It can happen you truly want to support, you know how deep the problem is and you don’t want to cover the shit up, you’re truly ready to face it and lend a hand. But the other pushes you away like : « I’d better keep you away from my shit cause you’re gonna get hurt and you’re gonna suffer… »

Does it mean they’re just not ready to face the problem themselves and they feel like they can’t do anything, so they simply prefer to get rid of you ?
Some way to stay in denial maybe...

Sometimes you just want to support and you truly end up feeling like you’re just bothering and you’re a pain in the arse.

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by Kyle

It can happen you truly want to support, you know how deep the problem is and you don’t want to cover the shit up, you’re truly ready to face it and lend a hand. But the other pushes you away like : « I’d better keep you away from my shit cause you’re gonna get hurt and you’re gonna suffer… »

Does it mean they’re just not ready to face the problem themselves and they feel like they can’t do anything, so they simply prefer to get rid of you ?
Some way to stay in denial maybe...

Sometimes you just want to support and you truly end up feeling like you’re just bothering and you’re a pain in the arse.

eh, sometimes people want to stay stuck in their own shit, it's what they know, and you can't "make" someone do something they don't want to do. they have to be ready. they have to want it. they have to say, at some level, "im sick and tired of this shit". because if they're going to be too busy enjoying it, they're just going to say no.

then there's the defense mechanism people have. shit like "i can control my addiction". or how everyone who has fucked up parents claims "my parents are alright", or even worse, "my parents are the greatest". or stuff like "i turned out ok after all". that's shit people tell themselves in order to keep themselves together because facing the pain of recognizing the truth would hurt too much. and when that happens without proper channels, people can go crazier than even before. so everyone spreads a little bullshit on the top. it's human nature.

that why i so much prefer shrinks than well-intentioned advice-givers. when it comes to dismounting those defenses and "helping" people look at their own bullshit, they know how to do it delicately, carefully, methodically, intelligently, so as not to cause more damage and more retreat into defenseland. and when finally the floodgates of hell are wide open & spewing all the garbage out, they know how to handle it with care. a lot of training goes into it. of course not everyone is as good as competent as they should be, but the odds are way better.

as for civilians/friends/family simply prodding people to do something about their shit-- i really don't care if im just bothering and im a pain in the arse-- if i am, ha ha, so be it! i don't give a shit-- i have more important things to do than look good. what i mean is, if i was insecure about the usefulness of what i am proposing, or the pain that people are stuck into, i would have doubts. but because i don't (well there are reservations for everything, but..)-- but because i don't, i can take some shit in return, knowing that it's worth it, you know what i mean? as for my time pestering cankers, i think it's time well spent, she's far from stupid.

but anyway, if you as a friend think you can call your friend's bullshit, realize that you can only do it to a point, and it's better to have someone who knows-- without knowledge, and training, you can't get into their brains without getting burned and without fucking them up as well. so there's a boundary there you have to respect. you can't force people.

[gmku]

I love the lifeguard picture! Reminds me of when I took swimming lessons in grade school. I remember even back then thinking how beautiful the girl lifeguards looked. Later in junior high it was an achievement to run across the pool deck or something so that you got the whistle and then called over to sit beneath the lifeguard's chair. Thank, mum, may I please have some more?

[ALIEN ANAL]

i love weed
i think about it at work
i think about it on the way home from work
i look back at the bong before i leave the house
i love weed

[gmku]

That's probably not healthy.

[!@#$%!]

chuckles...

[ALIEN ANAL]

hmm
i enjoy it
i love thinking of things to do whilst stoned
it brings out the creativity in me as typical as that sounds

[gmku]

I thought about "getting back into" pot a little while ago. I've thought better of it for this very reason. I would like it too much.

I dislike getting obsessed over things that don't last. Pot goes away. On the other hand, records, DVDs, books, art, even clothes stay with you for a while. They're things that, purchased once, continue for a long time to serve or satisfy you in some way.

While I sometimes think I'm addicted to too many material things (see above), I rationalize it with the thought that at least they can be considered longer-term investments.

I know, bullshit, right?

[ALIEN ANAL]

you said it

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by gmku

I dislike getting obsessed over things that don't last. Pot goes away.

nothing lasts, but the stupidity that pot invites lingers for too many weeks afterwards.

[gmku]

well, true. It's just that some things are more perishable than others. Pot, drink, food, etc. I mean that given a choice about how I spend what little disposable income I have, I'd rather see it going to things that I feel will last a while.

But yes, that, too. What seems like astonishing insight when you smoke is really stupid in hindsight. I'm also not fond of the idea of filling my lungs with smoke.

[ALIEN ANAL]

haha yeh the dumb ass feelin after being stoned
i find a good walk in the cold and a cup of tea soon gets rid ofit

[gmku]

At the same time... I often feel very peaceful and at ease for days after smoking (though I might not if I smoked more often than just once in a while). So maybe there are longer benefits. Still...

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by gmku

At the same time... I often feel very peaceful and at ease for days after smoking. So maybe there are longer benefits. Still...

there are better ways to deal with anxiety. just saying.

[gmku]

Yes, you're right about that. Definitely. When I sat zazen regularly, I could achieve a similiar sense of peace with the world.

And I don't mean to sound like a jock, because I'm not, but there is something to be said for regular exercise.

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by gmku

Yes, you're right about that. Definitely. When I sat zazen regularly, I could achieve a similiar sense of peace with the world.

yeah man. no need to have a *cough* mid life *cough* crisis *cough*

btw did you get the links i sent you?

[gmku]

Yes, thanks. Looks like burque's not a choice anymore, unfortunately. We're kind of bummed about it. But we're still holding out hope for Denver and Walla Walla. Portland is also now back in the realm of possibilities--her position opened up again there and she applied.