snoring
 

my ex-neighbour is staying in my house because his landlord (his cousin) kicked him out with only a weeks notice, but he snores like a bastard, leaves more mess than someone in his position aught and is showing no signs of finding a new place.

anyway, the matter at hand is this: i can't sleep because his snoring from the next room is keeping me awake. i'm tempted to suffocate him with a pillow.

do it. DO IT.

Seriously, I've delt with this before. What you may have to do is go in and literally roll him over on his side. Granted, it takes more effort then you may like to expend in the middle of the night, but at least the time in between this and him rolling back onto his back provides a small measure of decent sleep.

Clasp a clothespin on his nose.

i don't want to touch him, and i don't think i have any pegs

Putting him out is not an option...yet?

KILL HIM

or kick him out.

see i have a rule for guests, it's called "the 2-night rule". i abide by it as guest or host. it's based on an old roman proverb my dad likes to quote, and it goes like this: "guests are like fish, after the 3rd day they stink". or something like that.

my experience boiled down the "3 days" to actually "2 nights". the 3rd night is usually the shitty one. days are nothing.

so when someone asks me if they can stay at my place, i say, without hairs in my tongue (sorry, spanish expression), "yes, for 2 nights".

now there are cases when people have stayed longer or i've stayed longer but that means you have to buy groceries, cook, do the cleanup, buy presents, and generally make yourself invisible most of the day. we recently did that in a trip to dc and we've been invited back.

mooches who leave their underwear in the middle of the living room, drink everybody else's beer and make themselves seen & heard too much need to be kept to the 2 night schedule.

if that doesn't work, you could pepper him with leeches




oh, the joy!

but 2 nights. that's all.

Goodness.

When I first started working at the hospital, I saw a woman walking around with a bucket similar to that, and had to take a double take. Surely I wasn't really seeing those slimy bastards moving around in that bucket. I had to ask. Why did I ask? Horrifying. Yes, beneficial to someone who's ear is nearly falling off, but still, horrifying.

Can't you make him sleep on the sofa or in the hallway or something.

A friend of mine snores like a bastard and I've had to crash in the same room as him before a couple of times. Didn't get much sleep either time. I don't believe I snore...no-one has complained but that might be because they are too polite (doubtful)

I just get a hotel.

leeches for the leech, it's almost like a homeopathic remedy!

Aren't they supposed to clean your system?

Do you want to eat a leech and find out?

Let us know.

my roommate snores like a motherfucker and i HATE IT! so yeah, go ahead and kill the snoring bastard

Blimey, do you actually have to share a room with someone. That would be awful...I can't imagine having to do that. I imagine it's frustrating in so many ways.

i fucking hate people staying in my house. i've had people staying for two weeks before. i had to kick them out after that. i snapped. i couldn't take any more.

snoring doesn't keep me awake. i sleep like a rock. i probably snore myself.

I sleep like a rock, and take over the whole bed. How do I know I sleep like a rock, I did not feel the northridge earthquake. And I was sleeping on the floor.

I think I snore as well.

me too. if i'm sleeping in a bed with someone else they're always all the way over on the edge of the bed with my arm in their face or my legs all tangled around them and barely any covers (i steal all the covers too).

Yeah last time my boyfriend kept pushing me away all night, I was on his side, most of the night.